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Friday, November 14, 2008

Celia Speaks English!

If you've been following TFBOMGG for any length of time, you probably know that Celia, Miss Ginger's housekeeper, speaks very little English. She understands more than she speaks, so with some pointing, posing, and dramatic hand gestures, Miss G can usually communicate well enough to get a garment starched, some silver polished, or a pot scrubbed. Aside from those histrionics, the pleasantries rarely go beyond "hola" and "buenos noches".

But today, she said to Miss Ginger in the best queen's English: "Big kitty pee pee."

Oye! Apparently, Jackson felt like he needed some points in the reality game show that is their life:

In this week's episode, cattestants Jackson and Shelby are left alone with the housekeeper, which always makes for exciting television since they don't speak Spanish and she doesn't speak cat. Their "QuikMess Challenge" today was a group project to see who could kick the most litter out of the box between the time Ginger vaccuumed it up for the 12th time and Celia showed up for work. The winner was Jackson, who used a two-footed technique with 2 feet in the box and 2 feet out, allowing maximum paw surface for flinging the largest amounts of litter in the shortest time.
The Elimination Challenge was to see which cat could eliminate the most waste in the most inconvenient place at the most inconvenient time. Again, Jackson reigned supreme by managing to urinate on an unwashable faux-fur pillow just seconds before it was time for the housekeeper to leave for the night. Shelby thought she had that one in the bag with her wet furball on the bathmat after Ginger's shower, but Jackson one-upped her by the end of the challenge.
Tune in next week to see just how many times our cattestants can run between Miss Ginger's legs on her midnight run to the potty!


Beth said...

My goodness, what a couple of competitors! Sounds like Shelby has her work cut out for her next week! ;)

miss alaineus said...


top cat. that is so frickin' funny, and the elimination challenge was priceless.

part of my ocd requires me to change the litter every day. i have a little sticky mat under the box that has channels in it to keep the litter spray under control. target has them in the pet part.

precod! we are having soup as an appetizer precod.


Dannelle said...

Are the auditions for next season going to be anywhere near me? I have three eager players! Since we moved my babies have a $25 a month habit using pheremones. That doesn't even touch the Finicky "I only eat science diet" habit- Greenies treats only (no cheap imitation will do).And for this I get treated with furball in your slippers, furball medicine on the ceiling (haven't figured that out yet) and aplha cat wars! Not to mention they like to get up about
3 am and want human company! Waiting for next week's episode, Dannelle

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Sorry to hear about your pillow. I think Jackson is just getting warmed up, I predict another victory this week.

Miss Ginger Grant said...

Methinks Bucko is probably right, although they are napping together like angels right now. I think they are feigning teamwork as part of a distraction technique-

Indigo said...

This was hilarious. However at the moment Feather the little B**ch takes the cake. She set the fricking self cleaning litterbox off so often, she burnt it out and now it's fried.

I'm going back to the regular box and hopefully some peace and quiet in the house.

They were getting so lazy with that box anyway, they wouldn't even cover it up anymore.



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