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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Miss Ginger Van Winkle has Awakened!

Miss Ginger fell asleep during her massage yesterday, then crawled into bed and slept until around 10:30pm. She went back to bed after her tuna sandwich, and slept until just now, which is about 5 am. That's about 12 hours of sleep! Man, she needs a cup of coffee!
But she promised a review of Sunday's show, dear readers, so here it is. And don't laugh at her as she shows her age.

If ye remember, Miss G was going to see "some illusionist" with Dr. M, Asst. Antonio, and Dr. M's lovely daughter Emily. We let the "kids" pick the show, and they picked a new Cirque de Soleil show at the Luxor called "Criss Angel Believe". Even with as much cable television as she watches, Miss Ginger had never seen the A&E show "MindFreak" where this guy does crazy stunts and illusions. It begins in Cirque de Soleil fashion, with jibbering, dark clowns passing popcorn around the audience and climbing across the seats, etc. Lot's of false starts as the clowns try to introduce Criss, which made the whole thing drag on, but finally Criss emerges from the curtain and the show begins. A couple of pretty impressive "stand-up" type audience participation tricks, and then this electrical spark generator trick that "supposedly" goes wrong and Criss is blown to bits. Cue the ambulance sound effects, send out the clowns with a gurney to haul the "parts" off, and begin the "Cique de Surreal" dance routine during which Criss suits up for the next bit. Later. Rinse. Repeat.

Let's start with Criss- Cute boy, but way overprocessed! He' got a handsome face and maintains a nice body, but beyond that the rocker-goth gimmick just leaves Miss Ginger wanting a bar of soap. Black fingernail polish, black eyeliner, overdyed black hair chopped in shards that intentionally dangle over one eye, and the shredded denim, leather, and chain mail wardrobe just say one thing to Miss G: "I used to be a dork in high school but now I think I'm cool". Obviously he is targeted to a younger demographic, which could be the Luxor's demise: his demographic sits at home watching MindFreak on cable, not spending thousands of dollars to fly to Vegas, stay at the Luxor, and pay through the nose for theatre tickets. And Cirque de Soleil has officially destroyed their cachet by putting their name on this. Used to be if it said CdS you could count on quality entertainment, but this show is below their standard.
Oh, and if he had mentioned his girlfriend, Holly Madison, one more time, I would've barfed. Dude, we get it! You want us to think your straight. Okay, we'll play along. Wink, Wink.You met her at "The Random Reality TV Stars" convention, where she showed up sobbing after Hef booted her for the other bimbo. So you though it would butch you up to date Hef's sloppy seconds. But you spoke of weiner shrinkage "twice" during your banter! "Nervous turtle" I think was the descriptor. Straight men have no idead what I'm talking about because weiner shrinkage is just not a condition that they even recognize as exisiting!

But really, you look just lie the big ole queen from "Dead or Alive"! You may want to rethink that a bit! Even drag queens aren't using black eyeliner anymore! I just kept waiting for him to sing the old Liza song " That's Criss with 2 ss's not Chris with an H, cause that spells Chris not Criss...."

In other news, the mouth isn't too sore so far today, and the teeth seem less sensitive already. Today is a recovery day, and tomorrow is bite adjustment, so for today the teeth don't strike perfectly together like they will after tomorrow. Miss G loves sushi, and one barely needs teeth at all to eat that, so she'll probably head over to Caesar's for lunch later.
Here's a pic of the dental snowman someone made at LVI. His eyes are spit cups and his pipe is a suction wand!


David Dust said...

I want Antonio for Christmas.


Beth said...

"You spin me right 'round baby, right 'round, like record baby, right 'round 'round round...."

ACK! That's going to be going through my head all day! I loved your review. I can't say I'm a big Criss Angel fan, either. He's always struck me as a little precious and pretentious. We saw Penn and Teller when we were out a few years ago, and they're just plain fun.

I can't believe how much snow there is in Vegas! Love the snowman!

Hugs, Beth

Anonymous said...

LOL! Your take on Criss Angel cracks me up! As usual, you are spot on! I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better!

Indigo said...

I think it's an adolescent thing. I've never been even mildly entertained by Criss Angel. As Beth said I've always thought he was a bit pretentious, overindulging in the me, me category. Glad to hear your not in a lot of pain today dear friend. (Hugs)Indigo

mistress maddie said...

I'm glad to hear your bak up and kicking those heels,and enjoying the snow yet again! And Hon,I completely agree with you on the mindfreak guy! Black eyeliner? Take care tootes!

miss alaineus said...

that mindfreak guy is so he is stuck in a time warp in robert smith's body....i so hate the cure, why do you ask? you never heardi me dissin on synth-goth-pop before?

glad the mouth is feeling better.


Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Love the Snowman and acruments :o)

Glad the choppers are doing well.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you about the Holly comments - I think he mentions her in the show 3 times - ENOUGH ALREADY! I don't see her name on the marquee!

I caught David Copperfield at MGM - even though it's a smaller venue than David is used to playing, he got 4 standing ovations - he is STILL LEGEND in my opinion - check out HIS show, if you get back to Vegas...


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