Top Chef Robbery!

(Spoiler Alert!)

If Miss Ginger thought RuPaul's Drag Race was an hour long orgasm, you can imagine what she thought of Top Chef in New Orleans!

I won't recap the show, because David Dust and Minxeats do it way better. But I will, of course, give Miss Ginger's expert opinions on the subject!

First off, Miss Ginger wants to dislike Emeril the way she dislikes Harry Connick, Jr., but she just can't. Harry is egomaniacal. Emeril is just Emeril. He's hard not to like. And I've tried. It's not like New Orleans cuisine NEEDED a spokesperson to put it on the culinary map. But I think he has done an excellent job of keeping a VERY traditional cuisine modern, and making it popular with a whole new generation of foodies.

I thought the Houmas House "twist" was interesting. All us TC fans know they shake it up at the end, and I thought the quickfire was cool. On TV, Jamie's dish looked the most interesting, but I guess it's hard for us to judge without tasting.

And now. For the big one.

I think Fabio was TOTALLY robbed tonight! Hootie Hoo to Carla, who got excited about her opportunity and cooked her heart out, even if she didn't know how to steam open an oyster. She made it work, and I could see all along that IF she could get the shells off the oysters her dishes would be a success. Jeff tried. He really did. But the Dildo Beach club needs him back. And I think he would have come in 2nd, but unfortunately he had to win to stay in.

I could also tell throughout the kitchen scenes that Ho'sRUs was going to win the gumbo portion of the challenge. He knew what the hell he was doing. So does Miss G. And pecan crusted fish is one of her favorites. Why not take a perfectly healthy protein, coat it with more fat laden protein, and then pan fry it in butter? What's not to like about that, Dr. Cardiologist?

I think Fabio got a raw deal because Emeril didn't recognize the Italian contribution to modern Creole cuisine. New Orleans was 2nd only to New York as a point of entry for thousands of Italian immigrants during the fascist regimes. (Including some of Miss G's own relatives, who came from Italy and settled in NOLA.) Ever wonder why a New Orleans accent sounds so much like a Brooklyn accent? It's that Italian influence! Anyho, crawfish pasta and crawfish fetuccine are EXTREMELY popular dishes in Louisiana restaurants and Louisiana homes. Sure, it may not be "traditional" creole cuisine but it certainly has become part of the modern vernacular. His cocktail did sound like a train wreck.

And then there was Stefan. F^&*%n Stefan, the asshat. He totally punted in this episode. He clearly has no idea what gumbo is supposed to look like or taste like! (DD: send your BF this link!) That "beignet" thing looked like a question mark with a hard-on. And you never serve a cocktail "up" in New Orleans. Ever! It is the land of iced beverages! It's frickin' hot there!

And I've figured out why I don't like him. He has no soul. At the risk of sounding like Crazy Carla, there is no spirit in his food. It's like it is cranked out in a BMW factory (German engineering at it's best.) It comes across as cold and heartless as Lapilithuania or whatever other ice-laden country he claims to hail from this week.

And that's Miss Ginger's take on that!